Mother of two beautiful humans .Partner in Crime to my soulmate.Pet Mammy to 🐶🐱🐱.Early years Qualified on a break at present.Sister to 9.
I wanted to blog to share an honest, open view into our daily trials and tribulations with the highs and lows of our journey , which involves a recent ADHD diagnosis for my daughter.
- I know I’m not alone trying to navigate through this diagnosis?
- What does this diagnosis mean?
- What can I do to help?
- Who should we see first? What will happen next?
- Is it my a fault? How did I not notice sooner?
- Did I do something wrong when Pregnant,Birth, Early years?
- Had I been not stern enough , Was I too stern?
The list is endless…
I know the answers myself , I’m not to blame nor is anyone else .It is a disorder , a non visible physical disorder, that no parent or child causes.
‘ADHD – Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is a medical/neurobiological condition in which the brain’s neurotransmitter chemicals; noradrenalin and dopamine do not work properly’.- ADHD Ireland.
Parenting is hard.No rule book, just try your best and hope everything works out.And that’s not adding additional needs to the mix. You have incidents, behaviours, patterns and you get an assessment and you get a diagnosis.
Here’s what someone forgot to tell me…You will cry, hot salty, bitter tears for your baby.Life is tough and now its going to be harder for her. You have a reel of emotions like grief, for what coulda, shoulda, woulda been.The form that ticks indefinite diagnosis that changes ( and lets not be naive, it does change) your life and your child’s FOREVER. You will have to sit down and explain those four letters to a child who isn’t willing to accept yet.Who is scared of change no matter how softly, kindly and gently try put a positive spin on it. Don’t get me wrong I don’t care if she has ABCDEFGHIJK diagnosed, It wont change my love for her or how I see her.I just want to understand so I can try help guide her so life will be good for her.
I studied Early years for 3 years and additional needs is crammed into one module and guess how much I learned about ADHD..ZERO! Yet ADHD Ireland have said up to 60,000 children in Ireland have ADHD. It makes me mad, sad and all in between.Thinking how many children sit in front of teachers, early years professionals who have never been trained in this area.
We are adapting, we have been for a long time. We will cope, we will have outside supports. For now I’m working on Acceptance, and it will never change how much I love ,care, cheer on, encourage,support and advocate for my baby but its a journey I wanted to share.
Family: where life begins and love never ends.